There spoke the race! " he said; "always ready to claim what it hasn't got, and mistake its ounce of brass filings for a ton of gold-dust. You have a mongrel perception of humor, nothing more; a multitude of you possess that. This multitude see the comic side of a thousand low-grade and trivial things--broad incongruities, mainly; grotesqueries, absurdities, evokers of the horse-laugh. The ten thousand high-grade comicalities which exist in the world are sealed from their dull vision. Will a day come when the race will detect the funniness of these juvenilities and laugh at them--and by laughing at them destroy them? For your race, in its poverty, has unquestionably one really effective weapon--laughter. Power, money, persuasion, supplication, persecution-- these can lift at a colossal humbug--push it a little--weaken it a little, century by century; but only laughter can blow it to rags and atoms at a blast. Against the assault of laughter nothing can stand. You are always fussing and fighting with your other weapons. Do you ever use that one? No; you leave it lying rusting. As a race, do you ever use it at all? No; you lack sense and the courage. . Mark Twain
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  2. I love you like a fat kid loves cake! - Scott Adams
  3. Love can change a person the way a parent can change a baby- awkwardly, and often with a great deal of mess. - Lemony Snicket
  4. When God Created Mothers"When the Good Lord was creating mothers, He was into His sixth day of "overtime" when the angel appeared and said. "You're doing a lot of fiddling around on this one." And God said, "Have you read the specs on this order?"... - Erma Bombeck
  5. And next time you're planning to injure yourself to get me attention, just remember that a little sweet talk works wonders. - Cassandra Clare
More Quotes By Mark Twain
  1. After all these years, I see that I was mistaken about Eve in the beginning; it is better to live outside the Garden with her than inside it without her.
  2. When you fish for love, bait with your heart, not your brain.
  3. Good friends, good books, and a sleepy conscience: this is the ideal life.
  4. The fear of death follows from the fear of life. A man who lives fully is prepared to die at any time.
  5. Don't part with your illusions. When they are gone you may still exist, but you have ceased to live.
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